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Writer's pictureNeil Nagwekar

TINTA Poems #4


16. Nightly Reveries


Stars whiter than bulbs

Skyline at my feet

Arm gasping for breath

Trapped under a stupefied mind

Lost under bored clouds,

Dull crescents and soft flies

The size of peas.


Grins etch on my skin

Like cracks on dried rocks

Picturing vividly

Her eyes blank and bloody

Staring still from the casket

While I leak tears and snot

Accruing sympathy.


17. Free Man


Behold the free man in his glory!

Unshackled from chains of community

That bind him to people petty!

Perched on the podium of culture’s end!


Slave to none spare his own sacred head!

Donning his mortgaged crown like a king!

Commanding himself to pick paths paved

Slogging of his own accord in days

And yelling “fie on slavery” at nights!


Liberated from limbs in service to country! Indebted to his forefathers and banks!

Bled by doctors for his diseases

But wallowing groggy on his wheelchair

As he pleases!


He shall die happy; why wouldn’t he?


18. No Time To Wallow


When the worst of the storm has passed Leaving bones for homes and flesh for vultures

And a land so erased voyagers may ahoy,

It would be unwise to sigh “at last”;

It would be unwise to wallow.


Opportunists will still survive

And capitalists looking to line their purse-strings

What will not live are your tears

When the cruel sun will suck its teeth.

So run or sprint to stand

Devoid your skin from petty sympathy

Pursue, lead or follow till you succeed,

To fill little a life born hollow.


19. Little Charm


Plump as a potter’s pink masterpiece

It crawled in circles—hunting for nothing

Spare the chase itself

Like puppies on a leash.

Aunt Jenna bared wide white teeth.

“Lovely little thing,” her remark to her sister

Words learned from a novel

Or was it a letter?


When sis left, Jenna beheld the black sheep.

Twisting and turning like a tongue

Plucking lost food from gums

Its pudgy palms lifted blocks

Before flinging them at her walls.

When Jenna tossed toys in the sack

It bit her and bared moist milk teeth.

Perhaps it knew, and did not like her back.


20. A Lavish Sigh


When four-forked rivers whistle and upend

For your delight

But you silently stare at its invite

From the tallest tower of ivory

In living memory

Like mothers in their child’s casket

Sip Cognac as if it were chimera

And dream if drowning into its bowels

Well-bookended a perfect existence

Then can you truly complain

That society has pelted you with whips

Or held you in disdain?


When living is a chore to decide what to do

Until you die,

When decisions dally between virtue,

Art and avarice

Has life failed you—or are you guilty

Of inflicting it the deference

Of a mere game of dice?


Why so restless in paradise?

 

P.S. I hid behind the moniker of TINTA since the account was opened on Instagram. Truth be told, this has always been my natural impulse. If I had my way, none of my works would be attributed to me. I write a lot of miserable stuff, which I don’t want attributed to my character. I am proud of my writing, but it is also comfortably the worst of me—where my most cynical, nihilist and antisocial tendencies come to fruit.


For a while, I hoped I could hide behind TINTA forever. Perhaps anonymity is cowardice, but it has always been my impulse. But people tell me there’s nothing sustainable about the moniker strategy—that I must put my name, centralize my content, ensure I take credit for everything in a brutal industry, blah blah blah.


So, briefly, let me introduce myself: I am Neil Nagwekar from Mumbai, India.


I don’t plan on abandoning the moniker TINTA though. Because there is a story behind TINTA, and I think it will take quite some time for it to be completed.


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